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Lessons
Learned #3
To everyone that has kids, will have kids, or can remember
being a kid... just a few points of wisdom to pass on to the next
generation. No truer facts have every been penned:
Here Are Some Facts Kids Won't Learn in School, Teach Them
Yourself!
Unfortunately there are some things that children should be
learning in school, but don't. Not all of them have to do with
academics. Here are some basic facts that may not have found their
way into the standard curriculum:
Fact #1. Life is not fair. Get used to it!
The average teen-ager uses the phrase "it's not fair"
8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so
often, you decided they must be the most idealistic generation
ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, They
realized Fact #1 is true.
Fact #2. The real world won't care as much about your
self-esteem as your school does.
It'll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good
about yourself. This may come as a shock, but when inflated
self-esteem meets reality, kids complain, "it's not
fair". (See Fact No. 1)
Fact #3. Sorry, you won't make $40,000 a year right out
of high school.
And you won't be a vice president or have Onstar either. You
may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a Gap label!
Fact #4. If you think your teacher is tough, wait until you get
a boss!
He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you
screw up, he is not going ask you how you "feel" about
it.
Fact #5. Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity!
Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping -
they called it opportunity!
They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would
have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Destiny's Child
all weekend.
Fact #6. It's not your parents’ fault! If you screw up, you
ARE responsible!
This is the flip side of "It's my life," and
"You're not the boss of me," and other eloquent
proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your
dime.
Fact #7. Before you were born your parents weren't as boring as
they are now!
They got that way paying YOUR bills, cleaning up YOUR mess, and
listening to YOU tell them how much more know and how ignorant
they are!! And by the way, before you save the rain forest from
the blood-sucking parasites of your parent's generation, try
delousing the closet in your bedroom!
Fact #8. Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get
summers off! Not even Easter break!
They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you
don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on.
Fact #9. Television is not real life! Your life is not a
sitcom!
Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time
for commercials! And STAY OUT of neighborhoods where you don't
"fit in"; diversity is not as it seems on TV! You could
get hurt or worse!
In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop to go
to jobs. Your friends will not be perky or as polite as Jennifer
Anniston.
Fact # 10. Your kids are going to have a hoot looking at your
teen pics.
Full expect to hear your kids say, "At least we don't
purposely have our undies hanging out!"... A LOT! And
you should be just about 25 when you find out that it was Marky
Mark in the mid-80s that started the undies thing. How retro are
you!?
Fact #11. Be nice to nerds!
You'll probably end up working for one of them!
Fact #12. Enjoy school while you can!
Sure, parents are a pain, school's a bother, and life is
depressing. But someday you'll realize how wonderful it was to be
a kid.
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